How to face challenges with COURAGE
This week I had to display courage in many ways. It took courage to speak my truth when my voice was shaking. It took courage to own my reaction and own the consequences of it – and it took courage to reflect and revisit an uncomfortable situation to move forward.
It got me thinking about courage and just how important it is to live a fully charged and authentic life. Most of us will run into situations that require courage and, more times than not, we’re not ready. We don’t have our sword and shield up and we’re often blind-sided. What happens, and what happened to me when I wasn’t ready and had my back against the wall, was an instinctual reaction.
How do we know when courage is required?
C – Core Values
When something comes up that conflicts with our core values, it takes courage to speak up. It can be incredibly uncomfortable and even lonely to stay true to your beliefs when you’re facing the majority. But to live in congruence with who we are, we must stay true to ourselves. ASK: What core value am I associating with this situation?
O – Owning Your Part
We must own our reaction. We’re all human and, perhaps like me, you’ve found yourself gobsmacked and reacting in a way that wasn’t your best self. It’s ok. Don’t beat yourself up, stay there or dwell there. Your instinct took over; it’s time to move on but own your part and design a plan to do better in the future. In my case, I will do my best to breathe and get oxygen to that brain of mine so I can show up in a more controlled manner. ASK: How did I contribute to or escalate the situation?
U- Understanding
Taking a moment to consider the other party’s perspective takes courage, practice and patience. Understanding that you can violently disagree with someone and still love and respect them as a person is a huge realization and probably the key to greater civility in our culture. ASK: Who do I love deeply who thinks differently than I do? How can I get closer to them? As Brené Brown famously said, “It’s hard to hate up close.”
R- Reflection
Revisiting a situation that required your courage when the adrenaline is no longer pumping, and you can think clearly will help uncover your opportunity for growth. Journal about the feelings that came up, how you handled things and how you would like to show up in the future. ASK: How would my best self react in the future?
A-Attitude
Your attitude going into a courageous situation should be to speak your heart’s truth. I’ll admit that I’ve gone into challenging situations with the intent to win rather than be open to change. ASK: Does my attitude communicate that I’m growing and open to change?
G- Get ‘Er Done!
Don’t put off the inevitable. There’s an incredible amount of pain and discomfort that comes from delaying a courageous conversation. More often than not, they go a lot smoother than we think they will especially when we’ve taken time to prepare, reflect and approach with curiosity. ASK: Who do I need to have a courageous conversation with today?
E- Evaluate the Cost
Acts of courage come at a cost. Not stepping up and speaking your truth comes at a cost. We must evaluate how important the issue is. Will it cause more division? Will I lose a friendship? Will I lose myself? ASK: Can I let it go or must I speak my truth to feel authentic?
How do you handle situations that require courage? As always, we would love to hear your feedback and suggestions.
