Allies will accelerate your success
An ally will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear! A great friend listens, is empathetic, compassionate, and soothing. This is great under some circumstances like experiencing a loss. If, however, you want to be challenged to grow, you want an ally.
I was going through a difficult period in my life and one of my “big brothers” on my executive board said, you want an ally, not a friend, so I’m going to tell it to you straight. This gave me tremendous perspective. To change and grow, I needed the hard truth.
An ally may show up as a devil’s advocate. I have an amazing right hand person on my leadership team. She plays the devil’s advocate; she will challenge an idea or present her so-called “crazy idea” that is often genius. Having someone challenge an opportunity or decision, especially if you are a trigger-happy person and they are more measured, like in my colleague’s case, can save a lot of heart and headaches!
An ally, someone who really cares about you, will tell you the truth even when it hurts.
This morning I was helping my husband put his socks on. He had a back injury and while he was getting chiropractic treatment, he wasn’t seeing the results he wanted. His back often slipped out of place and it is something that he has lived with for almost two-decades. He’s going through a time which is literally and figuratively painful. He’s frustrated and this morning while I was helping him put on his socks he said, “I’m going to be like this forever, I’m so frustrated.”
I had just finished a workout, was dripping sweat all over his socks, looked him straight in the eye and said, “you have to own that you haven’t done everything you can to heal.” I’m sure it stung to hear that, but I love him enough to hold up a mirror. I’m not going to cuddle him and tell him that life sucks, relinquish control. Hell no! He has an opportunity to walk more, stretch more, be diligent about icing and getting massages. The truth hurts but staying stuck in the pain is worse!
Surround yourself with people who will challenge you to level up. The best mentors and most impactful coaches I’ve had, ask hard questions. They challenge my thinking.
Some of the zingers I’ve received included…
“You can step up to be a leader or hire someone who will.”
“Interesting… that sounds like your ego talking!”
Ouch! Sometimes these bold proclamations are what’s needed to change. If you’re facing frustration, ask yourself…
“How do I want to feel?”
“What’s at stake if I don’t change?”
“What is the reward if I keep consistent and stay determined no matter what?”
Seek out allies who will accelerate your growth by challenging you to be your very best. The truth hurts but it also heals and accelerates your success!
