Lessons Learned from my Jerry Maguire Meltdown
Last month I had a bit of a meltdown! Do you guys remember the scene in Jerry Maguire where Tom Cruise goes from seemingly stable and put together to losing his snizzle? Well, that was me!
To preface this, I should share that we’re almost into a full year of the COVID pandemic. We’re all feeling a little bit of pandemic fatigue. While I consider myself to be both pragmatic and optimistic, I had a moment where I lost my marbles! I was in the middle of having a super productive day and then I received a phone call. I heard about the new curfews in Quebec and possible “industry lockdowns” that were under consideration. I also heard that Ontario may follow suit.
My mind starting swirling! “What about our supply chain?” “What happens to my husband’s company if construction comes to a screeching halt?” “What if essential factories which have been keeping us in business close down?” “What if I have to lay people off?” I was experiencing what scientists will tell you is an amygdala hijack. That’s when the survival part of our brain takes over and our reasoning side of our brain lies dormant. The survival brain goes in full-on protection mode and you can no longer think in a rational manner. There’s a reason we’re told to count to ten when we’re panicking. It shifts our thinking from the Holy @#$% side of our brain to the reasoning side that can problem solve!
I went directly from that phone call into a marketing meeting and was unable to concentrate. One of my team members looked at me and asked if I wanted to reschedule. I said “no.” That was the first lesson. Leaders, you’re human. When you receive heavy news, take a break. Reschedule the meeting and come back once you’re thinking in a logical way again.
The second mistake I made was to go directly to a news page after the meeting and read about further “possible” restrictions. I don’t consume a ton of news for very good reason. It’s never positive and it totally impacts my mood and outlook. I got caught up in the negativity and it took over my afternoon. The lesson I learned there: deal with issues that are actually happening NOT pending doom and gloom!
The third mistake I made was to slip into a victim-mentality. “Seriously! How many more curveballs am I going to be thrown trying to run a business during COVID.” Anyone who knows me, knows that I’m big on ownership so having a “poor me” moment is so not like me. It’s completely incongruent with my values and so I felt uneasy. The third lesson and reminder to myself, as Brendon Burchard says “Honour the Struggle.” As my best friend told me during the height of COVID “Embrace the Suck!” I love that perspective because the success story is hidden in the suck!
The next lesson for me was to share my experience with the team. The next morning, apologized for my actions and attitudes from the day before. I acknowledged that I should have taken Lisa’s advice and rescheduled the meeting. I apologized that I didn’t show up as the leader and role model that I wanted to be. I shared my concerns and most importantly shared that we will re-focus and tackle whatever mountain stands in our way in the future.
As leaders, its difficult to stay strong during challenging times. Be open with your team and share your concerns, but you must take action. The last lesson is to remember not to stay stuck where you are! Yes, have your Jerry Maguire meltdown, feel the frustration and anxiety temporarily then move on. Re-frame, re-focus and rally the troops! You cannot control the outcomes, but you can control the inputs and your attitude as you face down adversity as a team!
Any hacks for bouncing back from setbacks and adversity? Would love to hear your stories and suggestions! Share them in the comments.
