SigmaU Blog

Over the last couple of months, I’ve become increasingly aware of my consumption.  When I am more disciplined about my physical, emotional, and spiritual consumption I’m peaceful and productive.  When I lose sight of this awareness, I can easily spiral into negative thinking and experience anxiety.

Outlets are an important part of healthy and balance living.  We have some outlets like exercise which support our growth in a positive way. Working out can also provide a way for us to feel a small sense of control in an unstable world. Other outlets include binge watching Netflix, alcohol, or drugs. Our outlets are ways for us to feel a little calmer, a little happier and perhaps numb our anxiousness. What...

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Nobody can bring you peace but yourself.” If that’s the case, the solution must lie in the actions that we take to generate peace. Perhaps we’ve been looking outside for a sense of stability and peace when we had the key to it all along inside of us.

It’s difficult to be at peace and present in our chaotic world. There are limitless distractions that cause us worry and upset and a plethora of reasons to raise our armour and be on the defense. In that state, however, we miss the everyday moments of calm and peace that can be.

I’ve learned that peace comes from being 100% present.

When we’re fully present and in the moment thinking only of the here and now, we’re not living in the past.  We’re not replaying all the wrong things that we said or did. We’re not considering others’ judgements on how they responded to our behaviour. We also aren’t anticipating the future or what we...

Most conflict arises from mismatched expectations which is why clarity is so critical.  Think about the last conflict you had with a partner or colleague. Chances are, there were misaligned expectations in the relationship. It could be mismatched expectations of communication style, deadlines, how you wanted the other person to engage with you.

In fact, I believe that our inner conflict happens when we have mismatched expectations of ourselves! I’ve spoken about the peace and joy that high performers have when their actions are aligned with their core values. When they are in congruence and showing up as their best selves, or who they say they are, they can be at peace. Inner conflict happens when we’re out of alignment. This inner battle can take place when we have mismatched expectations on where we are in life.

If I always bought in to the notion that I should be married by 25, own a house by 30 and have 2 children by 35 and my life doesn’t represent that...

I recently shot a video for LinkedIn about courageous conversations. I had assumed that people knew what I was referring to when I spoke about these conversations and I shouldn’t have. I realized this while I was wrapping up an introductory webinar on high performance and someone asked me to give an example of a courageous conversation.

In the moment, I gave a personal example and shared a story of a courageous conversation I had.  After the webinar it dawned on me that I should not only define courageous conversations but also provide you with some tools and lead-in conversation starters that I have found to be incredibly helpful as I’ve faced these once fear-inducing moments.

Here’s what I can tell you about courageous conversations: they are easier and easier to have as you build your courage muscle!

As a recovering ostrich who would put their head in the sand and avoid confrontation at all costs, I can tell you that I would never dream that confrontation...

Ever have one of those “hit you over the head” moments where your perspective dramatically changed in an instant?

Well, that happened recently while I was watching a recording of Brendon Burchard’s teaching.  He was talking about his ability to connect deeply with a diverse group of people across ages, gender, cultures, religions, political affiliations, and it all came down to one powerful concept.  Release your expectation that others should think and behave the way you do, and your life will be forever changed!

What the what what??!!! YES!

See I’ll admit, I was stuck in this way of thinking and it absolutely impacted my relationships. I would get frustrated when my husband would hold on to something that I deemed he was holding on to for too long. Well, who cares? Let him feel and process things the way he wants to. In the past, I would immediately want to remedy the situation, give him 3 ways to change his physiology or make him tell me 3 things...

When I’m afraid or feeling stressed my ego takes over! Bold statement, I know, but it’s true. I show up rude, sarcastic and I can be short with people.  When I’m leading as my best self and I’m intentional about how I want to show up as a leader, it’s a totally different story.

I’d venture to guess that as a leader, you may be able to relate. When you’re under pressure you just want things done and done properly with minimal questions and minimal interruptions so you can work on what’s most important.  This happens to most of us when we’re in reactive mode vs. being proactive and intentional.

Here are some telltale signs that I’m under pressure and my ego has taken over…

I assume the worst intentions. I have moments where I doubt the intentions of those around me and question if my team did all that they could in a situation vs. assuming the best in others.

When I’m operating from my ego, my ideas are...

If you’re a growth-oriented and innovative company then courage should definitely be a part of your culture. It takes guts to be different, to challenge the status quo and to set BHAGs (Big Hairy Audacious Goals) for your company!

To execute and navigate through unknown territory takes courage and it’s not enough for the leader to be courageous. Courage needs to be woven through the organization.

Show Courage as a Leader

Like most things, courage will require you as a leader setting an example for your team. My old coach Lindsay used to always say “Leaders get the behaviours they display or tolerate.” So how can you be an example of courage? Courage as a leader isn’t necessarily about control or leading the charge. In fact, courage as a leader shows up when you push yourself outside of your comfort zone. When you’re vulnerable by putting yourself out there on social media for example. It’s being courageous enough to admit to the team when...

Most leaders I meet hate firing people. Even if there was absolutely no way the relationship could continue and it was the wrong fit, firing still feels awful. 

I did this poorly for so many years and wish I had done a lot differently, but we live and learn. As entrepreneurs we don't have the luxury of a corporate HR team guiding our steps or doing the dirty deed on our behalf. 

One thing that I wish I did differently was address the issue with the entire team right away. Having said that, I'm grateful to say that it's been a very long time since I've had to terminate someone but these are the steps I would take again.

Rally the Troops 

Bring your entire team together, preferably in person or at least virtually if you're reading this during a lockdown. Without disclosing anything confidential and while respecting the terminated team member, explain that the team member has been asked to leave the premises and their employment has come to an end. It may be nice to...

Our leadership team had a terrific coaching session with our mentor Rob recently. We talked about the negative impact of leaders ignoring their people. He mentioned that when a relationship gets so broken down, the leader may actually give team members the silent treatment and start avoiding them altogether. What a terrible feeling for the team member trying to navigate their job!

This made me pause and really think about how our actions communicate to our employees that they’re not worth our time. See if any of these ring true for you as a leader or if you’ve experienced this yourself.

1. Constant Rescheduling

Nothing says “you’re not important to me” like consistently bailing on meetings. Obviously, there are some situations in which you’ll need to reschedule. Recently I signed up for a six-week training course. The team was gracious enough to reschedule my coaching with them only to have the course get cancelled. It was a bit of a palaver to...

We’ve all worked for draining leaders. One may come to mind immediately, or someone may pop in to your thoughts as I describe one of the worst bosses I’ve ever had. Let’s call him “John” for sake of anonymity! John was a charismatic salesperson who started a side hustle and recruited me from my part-time job in college to be his administrative assistant. I was so excited for the fancy title until I was about a week in.

See, while John was excited about his venture, he wasn’t an inspiring leader. In fact, it was draining to be around John because he just expected me to know how to do a job that I was never trained for. He would fly off on business trips, send me a list of 35 “urgent” emails that needed to be addressed and provided zero clarity on how to attack each one. He was wishy washy about expectations and when I asked him which email was the most important since they were all marked urgent, his response was “they’re...